How developing a series of morning rituals sustains and strengthens me
A Radical Ritual
I don’t speak in the morning. If you’re not a parent, this doesn’t sound too radical. But for a mom with a bunch of kids, it’s pretty radical to not talk. . This is something I’ve really stuck to over the last 2 years. I get up, I open my eyes and I just don't speak. I'll sit in my bed. I might read some news. I might pet my dog. Maybe do some eye exercises. This is how I begin my morning ritual. I really try to not use my vocals, for the first 30-60 minutes of my day, even if my mom calls.
I started this ritual because there's a part of me that loves order, structure, repetition, consistency, and predictability. I have since I was a little girl. And sometimes it works in a really great way for me and the people around me. But other times, that need shows up in me as strict and rigid, — like how I order my shoes, my closet, even my kids. My need for order, can be a real drag for the people around me. To counter that, I do rituals that tap into balance, grace, and flow.
I stay in my bedroom/bathroom area for a long time during the morning. So not only am I silent, but I'm by myself and in my own zone physically. I intentionally try to not engage. This is counter to what I used to do. A few years back, I would wake up and in order to get up, I’d look at my emails, they’d freak me out and I would just zip up. I’d be like, “Oh my God, 50 emails, I gotta go!” Those emails would act as my alarm. But now I don't want an alarm. Instead, I have a nice, warm welcome into the day by myself.
Movement as Meditation
So, the first thing is my silent morning. Then, I do a two-mile run, with music and my dog, Patty (short for Patterson). She’s a Cotton deTulear from Madagascar. I have two soundtracks for my run. One is, bravado music, like Drake, Nicki, and Megan Thee Stallion. The other is all love songs, with artists like Prince, Anita Baker, and Sade. I usually start with one and end with the other. The way I run never changes. It's slow and deliberate, I don't go for speed, and I barely lift my feet off the ground. My run is always 30 minutes long. When Patty and I return home, we have a ritual of how I clean her off, washing her feet and underbelly slowly. Then I do some stretching on my yoga mat, Patty stretches too.